I’ve raised my stepson since he was 4. He’s now 16 and ran away to his grandma’s

 


A Reader Asks:

"I’ve raised my stepson since he was 4. He’s now 16 and ran away to his grandma’s (dad’s mom). He’s been there for three weeks, telling everyone I abused him because he 'can’t take it anymore.' 🤦🏽‍♀️ He’s now admitted he lied. What should we do?"


The Answer:
Ah, the joys of parenting teens—a mix of lawyer-level lying skills and Oscar-worthy dramatics. First off, deep breath. You’ve got to handle this with equal parts strategy and humor, because this kid is testing boundaries like he’s preparing for the Olympics.


Step 1: Set the Record Straight

If he’s admitted he lied, great—step one done. Now, get that in writing. Yes, writing. A simple, “I lied about the abuse” signed by him can save you a ton of headaches later when the rumor mill revs up again. Teens don’t realize their words can have lasting consequences, so nip that in the bud.


Step 2: Time for Tough Love

Running away and lying? That’s not a free pass to Grandma’s cushy reset button. You don’t have to drag him back home immediately, but let him know:

  • “You’re welcome to come back, but the drama stays at Grandma’s. Here, we work on respect and honesty.”

Step 3: Let Grandma Enjoy the Show

If he wants to stay there, fine. Give Grandma a front-row seat to the teenage rebellion circus. Sometimes a little reality check (and seeing how much food a 16-year-old consumes) works wonders.


Step 4: Rebuild Trust at Your Pace

When he’s ready to come home, set clear boundaries:

  • Apologies aren’t enough—he needs to show respect and take responsibility.

A Little Humor to Get You Through:
Teens lie like it’s a sport, but the good news? They’re terrible at covering their tracks. Keep calm, play the long game, and let Grandma realize she’s not running a vacation resort.

Here are two great Amazon books to help you navigate the teenage drama Olympics:


  1. The Explosive Child” by Ross W. Greene

    • Perfect for understanding why teens act out and how to handle their strong emotions without losing your cool.

  2. Parenting a Teen Who Has Intense Emotions” by Pat Harvey and Jeanine Penzo

    • Offers practical tools for rebuilding trust, setting boundaries, and staying sane during turbulent teen years.

Good luck, and may your humor stay intact!

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

My daughter’s pediatrician is concerned that my daughter has an eating disorder.

When SnapChat and Burner Phones Cross the Line: Handling Inappropriate Content

Mom Feels Caught in a Swirl of Confusion: How to Handle This Misunderstanding