My daughter’s pediatrician is concerned that my daughter has an eating disorder.

 



"My daughter’s pediatrician is concerned that my daughter has an eating disorder. She lost almost 10lbs since September. She used to be bigger than all her friends since she was in middle school. She likes eating but no exercise or any movement. She used to eat too much sweet and sugary drinks. We were worried about her eating habit because she gained too much weight rapidly in unhealthy ways.

Last year, she started hanging out with some girls who are in cheerleading. They hardly eat, and they are very thin. My daughter stopped eating snacks this school year. She started running. I thought it was all good signs until we found out that our daughter tried to throw up at least twice last week. I found food she spit in the toilet because she forgot to flush it. The pediatrician recommended some dieticians, but it is not affordable with no insurance coverage. Any suggestions and advice would be appreciated. Thank you."

My Take: First, let me acknowledge how hard this must be for you as a parent. You’re trying to guide your daughter through a minefield of body image, peer pressure, and now what appears to be a developing eating disorder. The fact that you’ve already noticed the signs and sought medical advice is a big step forward—so give yourself credit for being proactive.

Here’s what you can do:

  1. Create a Safe, Open Dialogue: Approach your daughter gently, without blame or judgment. Let her know you’re concerned about her health and want to support her. Avoid focusing on weight or appearance; instead, discuss how she feels physically and emotionally.

  2. Emphasize Health Over Appearance: Shift the focus from how she looks to how she feels and functions. Encourage balanced eating and physical activity for strength and energy, not for weight control. Avoid labeling foods as “good” or “bad.”

  3. Leverage Free or Low-Cost Resources:

    • The National Eating Disorders Association (NEDA) has a free helpline (1-800-931-2237) and online chat to provide support and guidance.
    • Apps like Recovery Record can help individuals track their eating habits and thoughts in a safe way.

  4. Explore Local Support Groups: Many communities have free or low-cost support groups for teens struggling with eating disorders. Check with local hospitals, libraries, or nonprofits.

  5. School Counselor: If you’re comfortable, involve the school counselor. They may have resources or programs to help, and they can monitor her interactions with peers.

  6. Lead by Example: Model a positive relationship with food and exercise yourself. Avoid diet talk or weight criticism at home, even casually.

Helpful Resource: "Brave Girl Eating: A Family’s Struggle with Anorexia" by Harriet Brown – An insightful and compassionate book that offers hope and practical advice, available on Amazon.

And remember: You’re not alone in this. Eating disorders are complex, but with love, patience, and the right support, your daughter can heal.

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Mom Feels Caught in a Swirl of Confusion: How to Handle This Misunderstanding

Image
A mom shares her sadness over a misunderstanding with her 18-year-old daughter’s boyfriend and his mom. After discussing appropriate behavior at someone else’s house, her daughter misinterpreted the advice and relayed it to her boyfriend, who shared it with his mom, leading to accusations and miscommunication. The mom feels caught in a swirl of confusion and wonders how to handle the situation to restore peace. 1. Start with Empathy for All Parties This situation stems from good intentions all around: You care about teaching your daughter respect and independence. The other mom is trying to enforce boundaries in her home. The kids are navigating a serious relationship while still growing emotionally. Miscommunications are bound to happen with so many perspectives involved. 2. Revisit the Conversation with Your Daughter Your daughter likely shared your talk with her boyfriend because she felt it was helpful. However, it might not have come across as intended. Gently clarify the purpose ...
Read more

How to Start the Sex Talk with Your Daughters in a Culturally Sensitive Way

Image
Coming from an Asian family where conversations about sex and periods are often considered taboo, you’re breaking a generational cycle by wanting to talk openly with your 9- and 11-year-old daughters. It’s a courageous step that will empower them with knowledge and help them make informed decisions as they grow. 1. Understand Why It’s Important While it can feel awkward, having open conversations about sex and reproductive health teaches your daughters: To view their bodies with respect and understanding. To recognize healthy versus unhealthy relationships. To feel confident asking questions and seeking help when needed. 2. Timing Matters The ages of 9 and 11 are perfect for starting these conversations. At this stage, you can begin with the basics and build on the information as they grow. 3. How to Approach the Topic Start with Comfort and Trust Create a relaxed environment to make the conversation feel natural: Pick a quiet moment, like during a walk or while doing a shared activity...
Read more